E's Unconventional Buffy Shipping - Spike

Faith: "OK, that was fun! Who's next?"

Buffy: "Yeah, I'm feeling frisky!"

Tara: "Don't you too need to rest after all that?"

Cordy: "They're Slayers... They're sexual energizer bunnies."

Willow: "Oh, I know... Try being a Slayer's roommate... Every night she comes in from patrol..."

Spike: "Where the bloody..." (Harmony slaps him) "Owww!"

Harmony: "Jerk!"

Anya: "Oh, good. You're here. We can start."

Spike: (Looks around) "Bloody hell... You all aren't drunk, are you?" (Buffy, Willow, and Cordy snicker)

Faith: "What'd I miss?"

Willow: "Well... One night... Buffy, Cordelia, and I were drinking... and... BWAHAHA!..."

Buffy: "We'll get you caught up."

Spike: (Noticing Dru) "You're here, too? Now, I'm really worried..."

Faith: "First, the formalities... Dru?"

Spike: "This is Hell... And I'm being judged..."

Buffy: "Close..."

Dru: (Bouncing) "I get to do the formalities...

Title: Unconventional Spike Shipping, An Overview

Writer: E... Oooo... What does the E stand for... Enigmatic... Evil...?"

Cordy: "First initial..."

Dru: "Oh... Is it Miss Edith?"

Spike: "NO, IT'S NOT BLOODY MISS EDITH!!!"

Buffy: "Jeez, Spike, chill."

Spike: "Right! You try having tea with Miss Edith for a century..."

Dru: "Miss Edith says you're mean..."

Tara: "Dru, Miss Edith says she'd like you to get back to the intros..."

Dru: "Oh... Yes...

E-mail: ebailey140@aol.com

Notes: Continuing the Unconventional Shipping series, following the ones for Buffy, Willow, Faith, Cordelia, Giles, and my kitten.

Disclaimer: E's only borrowing us, for mysterious purposes... We belong to the wizard, Joss, and foxes and frogs.

Spoilers: Fanfic, the earlier Shipping Overviews, and Restless and To Sanshu In LA.

Warnings: The usual sexual situations, and some violence.

Archiving: Yes, but let E know."

Willow: "Tara, that was brilliant..."

Tara: "You just have to know how to handle them..."

We're back for another look at unconventional shipping in Buffy fanfic, this time focusing on the bleach blond vampire, Spike. Spike was sired by either Angel, or Dru, or both... Nobody's sure which. The three vamps were inseperable, until Angel was cursed by gypsies with his soul...

Spike: "And turned into a bloody wanker..." (Buffy hits him) "Owww! Oh, come on!!!"

Anya: "What are you complaining about? Isn't this usually foreplay for you two?"

Spike: "Oh yeah, that's right..."

After that, Spike and Dru were inseperable for decades, with Spike being devoted to his Dark Goddess. Unfortunately for him, though, Buffy boinked the soul out of Angel for a while, and the now evil Angel rejoined his old family. He proceeded to take Dru's attentions, while Spike could only watch and stew, due to having been temporarily put in a wheelchair by Buffy (though not through boinking). Once back on his feet, Spike entered into an alliance with the Slayer, to stop Angel and Dru from destroying the world, and to get their significant others back. It didn't work out well for Spike, though, as Dru proceeded to be, in Buffy's words, a big ho...

Dru: (To Buffy) "Why did you call me a farm implement?"

Dru dumped Spike for a series of increasingly gross demons. There are still many writers who are still attatched to them as a couple, though. A depressed Spike turned up in Sunnydale, with a new girlfriend, Cordette turned vampire, Harmony...

Buffy: "Punishing yourself?"

Harmony: "Hey!!!"

This didn't work out, but writers think they're a fun couple, so there's still fic. However, many writers prefer to pair Spike with others. There are two figures that dominate unconventional Spike shipping, as they seem to dominate all shipping...

Buffy: "Gee, can't guess who that could be..."

Willow: "We do get around."

Spike/Buffy...

This is based on many things. First, there's the obvious chemestry. There's sparkage in every scene, together. Then, there's the fact that visually, they match, nicely, both being lean, blonde, and fond of leather. They also share a love for sex and violence. Spike is obsessed with Buffy. He was the Big Bad, the Slayer of Slayers, and she trounced him time and again. He loves watching her in action, and craves the physical contact. He defines his unlife by a romantic ideal. He needs a Goddess to love and worship. Every jab, both verbal and physical, is a challenge to him, to conquer her...

Cordy: "Yes, yes, we get it, already..."

Oh.. OK. The other primary Spike ship is...

Spike/Willow...

This is based on Spike's affection, sort of, for her in Lover's Walk and The Initiative. He really wants to bite her, among other things, and she has a tendency to try to comfort him when he's depressed...

Willow: "I still think he settled... He was looking for Buffy..."

Well, yes, but he wanted to vamp you, as part of his plan to get Buffy...

Buffy: "How did HE know Willow and I had this subtexty thing going?"

Spike: "Hey, I'm observant. You two are bloody inseperable, and I really do like Red, so it would have worked out great, if I hadn't got stuck with this chip in me head.."

Willow: "That's sweet... Except for the being turned into vampires part..."

In many ways, it's Buffy's dark side that appeals so strongly to Spike. So, naturally, he'd get shipped with the embodiment of Buffy's dark side...

Spike/Faith...

Anya: "So, rather than being the slayer of Slayers, he's now the layer of Slayers."

Of course, there's also a lot of delving into Spike's past, and the relationship between sire and childe, leading to...

Spike/Angel...

This tends to get a bit rough, especially when Buffy's involved. The sire tends to be rather dominant, in every way. With a mutual Slayer love in the mix, Angel has a tendency to demonstrate who's the Alpha, soul or no soul. Given that Angel spent a lot of years with his own sire, she and Spike had to spend a lot of time together themselves, leading to...

Spike/Darla...

Darla: "You don't think I'd let Angel have all the fun..."

Buffy: "Aren't you dead? I mean, as in dust dead?"

Darla: "I got better." (Noticing the scar on Buffy's neck) "Angel...?"

To continue with the family theme, there is...

Spike/Joyce...

Buffy: "Spike..."

Spike: "Hey, she makes great hot chocolate, and she always listens..."

Spike's made his way through the various Scoobies, even....

Spike/Cordy...

Cordy even saw quite a bit of Spike before she was shipped with him in a very funny fic...

Spike: "FUNNY?!!! I was helpless, in a wheelchair, being molested by three drunk teenagers..."

(Buffy, Willow, and Cordy start laughing, hysterically)

It seems the three were having a sleepover, drinking lots of wine coolers, and looking at smut Cordy had swiped from Harmony's mom...

Harmony: "So THAT'S where it went!"

...And Willow and Cordy, still being virgins at the time, wanted to see a real man's "thing", as they put it, instead of just looking at pictures. Cordy had knocked Angelus out with a bottle, but Buffy wouldn't let them see his thing, that being for her eyes only (though she took some time to play), so she agreed that they'd take the now tied up Angel home to the factory, and she'd let them see Spike thing, whether he was willing or not...

Faith: "Damn. I should have been there..."

Because they bonded in a recent episode, we have...

Spike/Anya...

And completing Spike's tour of the Scooby gang, we've had his short term roommates...

Spike/Giles and Spike/Xander...

There is also, it seems...

Spike/Adam...

Buffy: "Ewww!"

Spike: "Look, pet, forget about that... I can think of things I'd rather be doing."

Buffy: "Such as?"

(Buffy and Spike begin a steamy make-out session. A shadowy, dark, figure slips up behind them...)

Willow: (Recognizing the figure) "Um... Guys..."

(WHACK!!! Spike is knocked to the floor by the figure)

Buffy: "Uh oh..."

Cordy: "Hi, boss."

Dru: "DADDYYYYY!!!"

Spike: "Bloody hell..."

Angel: "So, Spike, my boy... Playing with what's MINE without my permission..."

Buffy: "Not again... Look, Angel, I'm NOT your fledgling!!!"

Tara: "W-what's going on?"

Anya: "Oh, that's the vampire family hiarchy thing. You see, the childe has to have the sire's OK to have what's the sire's property. Otherwise, it turns into a disciplinary thing, where the sire has to re-establish his mastery, in an NC-17 fashion.."

Cordy: "Well, I'd say this is a good time to take my leave..." (Angel glares at her, sniffs, then growls at Spike some more) ...Or not..."

Buffy: "I am NOT your property!!! I don't care how it is with vampires, but you DON'T OWN A HUMAN BEING!!!"

Harmony: "Well, he did mark you... You have the scar... Speaking of which..." (Starts to approach Willow)

Faith: "Oh, no you don't!" (Knocks down Harmony) Yeah, yeah, I know when you vamps bite someone, you're marking them as your territory, but Red here was also bit and drained by the First Slayer!"

Buffy: "Yeah! So, Willow's OUR property!!!" (Turning to Angel) "Now, as I was saying..."

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